Texts from Last Night: Homecoming Edition
(214): Sorry the juul wasn't working but I just fixed it
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(214): Sorry the juul wasn't working but I just fixed it
We all know the motto for spring term’s big weekend: “Green Key is a marathon, not a sprint.” If you’re reading this, that means you made it past the finish line, and whether or not you crawled that last leg or not, you are a CHAMPION. And no matter what your weekend was like, we're sure it was filled with loving alums, sunshine, darties and a whole lot of MDF approved alcohol. And even more potent than the surges of regret you are still reeling from in your Annex B cubicle are the drunk texts hanging over your head like a raincloud of shame. And just like we do every year, Dartbeat has compiled the most hilarious and egregious Green Key texts you'll never live down:
It was quite the magical Big Weekend for 17W. Whether you had one too many (butter)beers or someone hit you with a Forgetfulness Charm (Obliviate!), there's a good chance you may not remember some of the questionable texts you sent. Luckily (or unluckily), Dartbeat has proven once again that the internet is forever and no Vanishing Charm can save you. Without further ado, we present: the best "Texts from Last Night" from Winter Carnival.
For better or for worse, DDS is finally getting with the times with its new texting feature. As the (masked) face of DDS and liaison between students and their tender quesos, we often forget that the text responses are coming from a real person (or people) with thoughts, feelings, fears and aspirations of their own. These noble first responders have to bear the brunt of any feedback, constructive or otherwise. Here’s what’s going on behind the cheeky one-liners and smiley faces.
Dear old Dartmouth, set a watch, lest the old traditions fail. What is a more time-honored tradition than opening up your phone over Homecoming and jamming your fingers into the keyboard for long enough to send out the poetry that is a drunk text message? Another tradition: Dartbeat reminding you that a hangover is temporary, but drunk texts are forever. Here are your best texts from last night from this Homecoming: