Dartmouth Yankee Candles
It’s Week 4, you’re sitting in bed crying studying for your econ midterm tomorrow and all you want is something to mask the smell of your room, which hasn’t been cleaned in weeks. And what could be better than one of Dartbeat’s very own, totally not cultish, Dartmouth-inspired Yankee Candles? There’s nothing like the crackling of the wick and a strong whiff of Keystone to get you through all the problem sets you’ve put off until the last possible second!
While most college students across the country wish their rooms smelled like “Sandalwood Vanilla,” “Piña Colada” or even “Man Town,” during the hellishness of midterm week, what you need are some truly Dartmouth-esque smells to remind you of the good times you’ve had at the College on the Hill.
Lone Pine
Nothing like a reminder that you live in the middle-of-nowhere wilderness to get you through a tough day’s work!
Foco Cookie
Be whisked away by the warm and homey smell of Foco cookies, a major food group in the freshman food pyramid.
Soppy Laundry
This scent will remind you of one of your favorite experiences at Dartmouth: the time you walked into the laundry room and saw your no-longer-clean wet clothes in a messy pile on the floor. #RIP
Mozz Sticks
Add the marinara sauce and you have the reason why you had to do laundry on a Thursday night in the first place.
Touch the Fire
Whether you’re the traumatized freshman running around the fire, or the screaming upperclassman doing the traumatizing, you can’t get enough of this Big Green twist on the classic s’mores/camp-fire scent.
Burnt Novack Coffee
Speaking of fires and burning things…
Eau de Stale Keystone
Mmmm, nothing like the smell of pong on a Tuesday night to get your brain (and stomach) churning.
Frat Basement
For those of you looking for a fancier, more sophisticated version of the “Eau de Stale Keystone,” upgrade to this time-honored mix of beer, boot and something decaying.
Heorot Highlighter Party
Want to be super nostalgic about freshman fall? Look no further than the “Highlighter Party” candle—an all-inclusive scent that combines the aroma of frat basements with the eye-burning, toxic sweat fragrance of frat ban ban dance parties.
TDXmas
Finally, a classic blend of peppermint and pine tree topped with a hint of regret.
All photos courtesy of Margaret Jones for The Dartmouth.