Valentine’s Day is a mixed bag of a holiday. For some, it’s a fun excuse to celebrate their romantic partners, but for others, it may elicit negative feelings. While the holiday traditionally focuses on romantic love, that’s not the only form one can celebrate. “Galentine’s Day” — a holiday focused on women’s friendship — has made February a month for celebrating more than just significant others.
According to Aleaokalani Kahele ’27, Galentine’s Day — traditionally celebrated on Feb. 13 — offers an opportunity to dedicate time to friends and honor non-romantic relationships. Kahele — who also marks the day of love by “wearing Valentine’s themed pajamas” and giving out “party favors” to people she knows — celebrated the occasion with a Galentine’s Day party last February.
“I think Valentine’s Day is such a holiday that’s focused on a significant other, which is great, but I think especially in college, female friends are so important,” Kahele explained.
Now, Kahele is planning to continue the tradition this year.
“This year I wanted to go all out because I realized we only have one more [Galentine’s Day in college after this one] because me and most of my friends will be off next winter,” Kahele said. “I actually printed invitations and delivered them to people’s dorms with chocolate [this year].”
Similarly, Iris Montesano ’27 is getting her friends together for Galentine’s Day to “get some takeout” and “celebrate the connection” they share as a group.
“I feel like for individual friends, you have birthdays to celebrate them and that’s great, but to me, Valentine’s Day is a day where you can celebrate your group of friends,” Montesano said. “I think that’s really valuable and something we don’t really have in any other holiday.”
But Galentine’s Day celebrations don’t just have to center around big get-togethers and dinner parties. Some students choose to focus on small acts that show their appreciation for one another. Last year, Jasper Johnson ’27 and her friends expressed their love for each other through small gifts.
“Just knowing your friends are thinking of you honestly means more than anything romantic,” Johnson said. “I think there’s an [expectation] that romantic [partners] need to think about you, so it feels more special that a friend would take time out of their day to do that for you.”
Several students noted that celebrating friendship instead of romantic partners has made the holiday more inclusive to those not in relationships. Kahele said “reclaiming” the traditionally exclusive holiday and transforming it into something “to look forward to” has been rewarding, especially because “if you’re single it can be hard, especially in college.”
“I think Galentine’s [Day] is so special because it brings people together and makes it more [of] a casual, fun thing,” Kahele said. “I would encourage people to not just think of Valentine’s Day as a holiday that’s for a significant other. It can be just as fun — even more fun, honestly — to celebrate with your friends.”
Montesano added that it’s especially valuable to show appreciation to those friends who are “always there for you, Valentine’s Day or not.”
In a similar effort to reclaim the holiday, Johnson likes to focus on her single friends as a way to combat the romantic pressures of the day.
“On Valentine’s Day it’s really easy to feel sort of negative about yourself if you aren’t in a relationship and if you can fix that for someone or give them a little bit of love, or a sense of meaning and that they matter regardless of their romantic standing, I feel like that’s really important,” Johnson said.
She added that prioritizing lasting friendships over significant others gives power to companionship and makes it a more enjoyable holiday.
“Getting to focus on people I know love me back with their whole heart, which is my girlfriends, takes away that anxiety and makes [Valentine’s Day] a positive experience to look forward to,” Johnson said.
That said, those with significant others can also join the Galentine’s Day fun — although several of her friends “have boyfriends,” they still celebrate together, Kahele said.
For many at Dartmouth, commemorating the importance of female support has become a meaningful aspect of Valentine’s Day. Montesano ultimately believes that — by shifting attention away from romantic relationships and instead centering the day around “a different kind of love” — Valentine’s Day has become an empowering holiday.
“To me, my group of friends will always be more valuable to me than any one relationship or situationship that I have because I know that my relationships with my friends are going to be forever,” Montesano said.
Ultimately, Galentine’s Day is about just that: lasting friendships.
“Not only will [spending time with friends] fill the void of what we’re taught that day is optimally supposed to be, but it also fulfills even more needs in terms of platonic relationships — it’s easy to forget how crucial those are too,” Montesano said.
