Now that we’re sophomores, we have all declared a major in something that we are at least remotely interested in. However, for many students the standard majors of biology, math, English, economics or government do not fully encompass their interests, passions and goals. Other universities and colleges offer some majors that are more specified for certain interests. For example, at Dartmouth you can major in music, but at Liverpool Hope University you can major in The Beatles. At University of Connecticut you can major in puppet arts if you decide you don’t like being on the theater stage yourself. Harvard University offers a concentration in folklore and mythology, in case you didn’t get enough of that as a kid. If we had our way, here are some of the majors we’d make out of classes that already exist at Dartmouth.
Animal Loving
There’s no doubt that the most popular kids on campus aren’t actually kids but pets. With the recent addition of new puppies at several fraternities, Facebook newsfeeds have been flooded with pictures of baby animals. So what if you wanted to turn your favorite pastime and cuddle buddy into your major? Start with “Lemurs, Monkeys and Apes” in the anthropology department and add the Earth sciences course “Dinosaurs” for a historical component. Maybe round out the major with some psychology classes so you can learn how to classically condition an animal and some biology involving coursework in evolution.
How to be a Politician
Dartmouth already offers a major in government and a minor in public policy. So if you want a future on the Hill, you’re probably doing at least one of these and maybe taking a few econ classes, too. However, as we have seen in recent years, being a good politician isn’t about having a background in how the government is supposed to work or how to formulate policies. Majoring in how to be a politician would basically teach you how to be Frank Underwood. In fact, the culminating experience would probably involve watching and debating the plausibility of episodes of “House of Cards” and “Scandal.” But before you get there you would have to take Anthropology 16: “Secrecy and Lying in Politics”, Government 31: “Campaigns and Elections” and Speech 25: “Persuasive Public Speaking.”
Lifting
Athletes at Dartmouth spend a lot of time at practice, and this extracurricular already fits prominently into their resumes. So what if they could major in being a varsity athlete? Coursework would include practice, lift, conditioning and team bonding. Majors would also have to complete several PE classes. In order to graduate with honors, your team would have to qualify for NCAA championships. NARPs can major in lifting as well by taking PE classes and playing a club sport. They could also join varsity teams as managers for extra credit.
Comedy
For those who don’t really know what they want to do with their lives but like to make people laugh, comedy is the major for you. The intro course for this major would be Classics 2: “The Tragedy and Comedy of Greece and Rome,” where students learn about the origin of comedy. Most students drop the major after taking this class and realizing that comedy in ancient Greece and Rome is not actually that funny and most of it is a “you had to be there” kind of humor. Plan for a concentration in Jewish comedy and take Jewish Studies 22.3: “From Fanny to the Nanny: Jewish Women and Humor” and Jewish Studies 24.2: “Rabbis, Rogues and Schlemiels: Jewish Humor and Its Roots.” This major provides plenty of career opportunities — including writing Conan O’Brien’s graduation speeches.
Rock(s)
This interdisciplinary major is perfect for those students who are torn between their love of science and their more creative talents. The major would be primarily made up of classes in the music and Earth science departments. A major in Rock(s) eschews classes like Music 5:”History of Jazz” or EARS 3:”Elementary Oceanography” and focuses only on the two “Rs.” In order to graduate, all majors must create and produce a “Schoolhouse Rock” episode about — you guessed it — rocks.
Gaming
If your favorite mode of procrastination is breaking out the Xbox, this major mixes work with pleasure. But don’t get too excited. This major consists of some pretty intense courses not for the light-hearted. Core courses include Film 38: “Advanced Animation,” Film 51: “Game Design Studio,” Computer Science 24: “Computer Animation” and Engineering 31: “Digital Electronics.” The computer science and ENGS courses require several pre-requisites, making this major equivalent to majoring in both computer science and engineering. Like I said, this may seem like the major for the couch potato who plays video games all day, but in reality it’s probably more fitting for the closet genius.
Pre-CIA
Forget pre-med — for those budding Carrie Mathisons out there, this major will prepare you for a life undercover. Pre-CIA requires a mixture of psychlogy, government, and geography with classes that will keep you on your toes. Maybe throw in a martial arts class or two as well. Popular classes include Government 54: “International Security,” Geography 23: “Power, Territoriality and Political Geography” and Psychology 44: “Psychology and Organizations.” Speaking a foreign language fluently is also a requirement for this major.
Never Wanted a Job Anyway
This is what we all wish we could major in. There are absolutely no requirements for this major. You simply have to take 10 classes from 10 different departments: the more random and interesting, the better. Popular choices include drumming and Chinese 62: “Chinese Calligraphy.” Classes in the Thayer are frowned upon, as is ECON 1. If you aren’t excited for class every day, you are doing this major wrong. This major is all about learning for the sake of learning, not to sell out to Wall Street or become a millionaire by taking your startup public. Lastly, in order to graduate magma cum laude, you must lack a job and plan to move back in with your parents after graduation.
