Sloppy Joe, Sloppy Jane, Yum Yum, Wimpie whatever you choose to call it, this beefy, gooey creation is about as American as Full House. It is one of those concepts that makes perfect sense in the U.S.A. but in retrospect is probably included on other countries' laundry list of reasons why they hate America. If you think about it, Sloppy Joes essentially defy common sense. Instead of having the meat in a neat little patty, some guy named Joe decided to go the opposite direction and build the messiest sandwich possible and then come up with a name that celebrates its messiness. So while Italy has its tidily packed ravioli and France has its nice little portable baguettes and croissants, America has its big gooey messy (albeit incredibly tasty) burger that most people need to wear a bib to eat. Good thing we live in the Hanover bubble, where no one else will be able to see you savor this week's delectable creation: the classic Sloppy Joe. 1. Get a meatball from Collis with lots of marinara sauce.2. Grab a bun from the Collis sandwich line.3. Add some Tabasco sauce and chili powder to the meatball, to taste.4. After you check out, add two pumps of ketchup and a few shakes of salt and pepper to the meatball.5. Use a fork to grind the meatball.6. Spoon it between the two buns.
If you think about it, there are very few food items that we can claim as truly American it's mostly dishes we stole from other countries, added a bunch of grease and fat to and then labeled as "All-American." (See: hot dogs, pizza.) Sloppy Joes, however, are our own wonderful, oleaginous (read: oily) creation. If this doesn't make you proud to be an American, I don't know what will.
