In constructing an argument about BlitzMail, I need to start with a caveat -- I'm an email novice. I had an embarrassingly-titled hotmail account in middle school to chat on MSN, but that's about it. Hand me an iPhone and my eyes will fill with dread. Bottom line -- the technology of communication is not my forte.
That being said, I have a good grasp on Blitz. It's so indoctrinated into my vocabulary that I frequently bewilder people from the real world by telling them to "Blitz" me, and I forget to bring my cellphone 90 percent of the time because Blitz is just, well, easier. Receiving calls from guys outside of Dartmouth actually sends me into a state of panic, because you don't get the same amount of time to respond (and confer with girlfriends) when you're live on the air.
Unhealthy relationship with Blitz aside, my infatuation with this communication system hasn't blinded me from seeing some of its downsides. Instead of harping on my hang-ups, however, I am going to suggest a number of improvements:
1) Implement Google's "Mail Goggles," only better. Sobriety function on Blitz? Great idea. Asking college students to do a few simple math problems? Probably not the most effective screening mechanism. Some cell phones have a feature where you can prohibit yourself from calling certain numbers at certain times a day. That's an idea. Another is to attach a Breathalyzer to your Blitz system whereby all of your attempts at sending blitzes are saved as drafts until you blow below a 0.05 (to stay consistent with Dick's House, of course) and can make a consenting decision about hitting "send."
2) The "Take me off this blitz list" button. Whether to escape blitz wars, or to stop receiving blitzes from those organizations you accidentally expressed interest in at the activities fair your freshman fall, full inboxes across campus would rejoice.
3) This is pretty standard among e-mail systems (Even Facebook does it. That's embarrassing): but automatically including the content that's being responded to in a return e-mail. Until then -- '12s, I'm looking at you: please highlight before you Ctrl+R.
4) A way to settle "nickname" arguments. Instead of having to awkwardly blitz the kid who entered the same nickname as you because you aren't getting half your blitzes anymore, Blitz should set up a means of settling the dispute. Set up a jousting arena in Leverone, base the decision on seniority or auction the nickname off to highest bidder -- it's not like Dartmouth couldn't use the extra funds.
5a) A sympathetic sent-messages folder. I haven't quite ironed this out from a technological standpoint, but Blitz should automatically delete those really embarrassing and cringe-worthy blitzes that leave you avoiding dining halls at meal times. The benefit of the drunk dial is that you're left with, at best, a name on your "dialed calls" list and a vague memory that a conversation took place. With the current state of the sent messages folder, you can see just how fantastic your typing skills were and what exactly you shouldn't have said. Bad decisions happen, but they're best remembered blurrily, not word-for-word.
5b) An unsend button. Enough said.
The bottom line is Blitz can, with a few improvements, maintain its position on campus as the dominant form of communication. It's not about being the most cutting edge, it's about catering to Dartmouth.
