Bad choices happen. Too much alcohol happens. S&S happens. Even with these inevitabilities, however, there's no reason that getting picked up should constitute a necessary element of the essential Dartmouth experience. It's just not that special.
Before addressing the bigger picture at stake here, it is important to note the directly negative consequences of spending a wonderful night, morning (and possibly afternoon) in Dick's House waiting for your BAC to drop to its appropriate level.
First of all, cost. Granted, you get a free bagel and juice in morning, but that hardly offsets the 3-digit bill you'll receive in your Hinman box for the apparent "doctor supervision" you required as you slept it off.
Next, judicial consequences. If we're strictly talking first offences, you'll get off with no more than a meeting with your dean, and the joy of participating in a three-hour seminar at Dick's House with other miscreants re-learning the foundations of AlcoholEdu.
Finally, you're one-third of the way to an unplanned couple of off-terms without BlitzMail or the privilege of visiting campus. There's nothing laudable about getting Parkhursted, no matter how much of a hard guy you may be.
One may argue that getting picked up is a rite of passage, not so permanent and severe a misdemeanor as to affect future border crossings and government job applications, but still a worthy judicial breach. One of the fundamental problems with this line of thinking is the fact that there is absolutely no skill involved, in addition to no significant consequences.
Step 1, consume too much alcohol.
Step 2, display obvious signs of said consumption to Safety and Security officers and/or individuals concerned enough to Good Sam you.
Procuring alcohol and finding those not-so-elusive officers in front of whom to flaunt your slurred speech? It takes more skill to find a study spot in the library during finals.
This should not be construed as a call to actively evade S&S once they've identified you as intoxicated in order to add an element of challenge to the game. That's a terrible idea.
We've all heard stories about peers bravely running away from Dick's House, only to receive a not-so-friendly visit from an S&S officer the next day because they had already given their names. Furthermore, if you come across as confrontational or disagreeable, it is easy and well within Safety and Security's jurisdiction to pass you along to Hanover Police, which leads to real-life consequences, like jail.
As an alternative to spending the night in the slammer, a friend of mine woke up in DHMC with a dislocated knee after trying to stealthily run away from an S&S officer. Needless to say, he didn't remember the encounter, and his attempt to flee didn't end particularly well. It's hard enough to walk around sober in daylight with weather conditions like this -- running drunkenly in the dark is bound to get ugly. So if you're getting picked up, just go with it. Worse things could happen.
It is possible that part of the appeal of getting picked up is the ability to have a "run-in-with-the-law," without actually making a mark on that clean record. Overachieving "X" goes to an Ivy League, only to have a run-in with campus security for partying too hard -- what a story to impress your friends from home who didn't think you had it in you, eh?
False.
It's going to take a lot more than that to undo your high school reputation, and your friends will likely attribute your run-in to inexperience.
"Aww, little Johnny didn't know how to control himself with alcohol."
Don't fight your reputation. Instead, embrace your inner nerd. We'll be waiting with open arms.
