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The Dartmouth
November 29, 2024 | Latest Issue
The Dartmouth

Amy Knows Everyone

I'm over 21, I've been at Dartmouth for almost four years now, and I'm a girl, which means I normally don't have the urge to chuck things at people, or if I do, I seldom follow through with it.

Because of all this, I'm not really all that worried about my relationship with Safety and Security. Actually, I don't really think about them much at all, other than as the instructors for Rape Aggression Defense class -- and ladies of Dartmouth, you really should consider taking this class. It counts as a PE credit and you get to attack a man in a suit made out of the material padded rooms are made of.

But I remember being a freshman, terrified that I would mess something up and find myself face-to-face with an angry S&S officer. and thus would end my blemish-free, goody two-shoes record.

During sophomore summer, I turned 21. I celebrated the normal way: doing shots off a shot-ski in a tiara and heels. In all honesty, I wasn't so much celebrating the fact that I could drink, but more that I could drink without having to worry about getting caught by Safety and Security or Hanover Police.

With this in mind, I decided to talk to one of my favorite underage freshmen, so cautious that he requested even his first name was not used in this piece, which is why I'm going to refer to him as Nick from here on out.

Nick's basic principle about dealing with Safety and Security is similar to the one I have about wasps.

"I don't think Safety and Security will bother you unless you're stupid about it ... [I just] keep going and mind my own business," he said. "I heard a story that as long as you're not putting yourself in danger or anyone else in danger and they pull you over, they might help you instead."

At this point, S&S officers were starting to sound like powerful mythical creatures with the potential to do good. Like dragons, or fairies. I asked Nick to clarify. His point boiled down to one particular incident: a bunch of his friends were drunk but with someone who was sober. They were all climbing into a car and an S&S officer stopped to make sure the person who was driving was not under the influence, and then moved on.

I asked him if he had any experience with the Hanover Police.

"I honestly never see H-Po. I don't live that far from Frat Row ... but I've heard that walking across the Green is bad."

"Yeah, don't do it." I told him, teasing, but only slightly.

After all, I made Nick look like a rebel when I was a '12. Well, you know what I mean, a freshman.


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