If everyone were to make a commitment to better understand sexual assault, "we can clean up the environment for assault survivors", Kerry Rochford, a counselor and training advocate for the Women's Support Services of Claremont, told the audience at a panel discussion last night.
The panel discussion, "How to Support Survivors of Sexual Assault; Emotionally and Medically," was held at Dartmouth Hitchcock Medical Center.
Rochford-Hague addressed the "myths" concerning commonly accepted views of the circumstances surrounding sexual assault, while encouraging a more realistic understanding of a victim's reaction.
"Myths are what determine attitudes and attitudes effect what kind of treatment a person gets," she said.
The myths include the notion that rape is motivated by sex alone, that it is usually committed by strangers in dark alleys, and that a woman who "follows all the rules" cannot be raped, Rochford-Hague said.
Rochford-Hague said, "You're far more likely to be assaulted by some one you know: by somebody you live with, your friend, your boyfriend, someone you dated."
The key to such situations is respect, according to Rochford-Hague.
"If you're in a relationship and you're getting mixed messages, it means 'stop and talk about it' not 'let me manipulate you until I get what I want,'" she said.
The panelists said people also assume women often lie about being raped.
Jennifer Trembley, an emergency room nurse and organizer of the Sexual Assault Response Team Seminars at Valley Regional Hospital, described sexual assault as it relates to health professionals.
According to Trembley's statistics, women who report being sexually assaulted are lying less than two percent of the time.
Many of these myths encourage "self-blame," she said.
"I always tell the women that there is nothing you may have done to deserve being raped," said Trembley. "I don't remember a time when I haven't said that."
Rochford-Hague added, "An attitude like 'she asked for it' or 'she deserved it' can infect the whole environment surrounding a rape victim" and make it more difficult for the victim to begin recovery.
The speakers stressed sensitivity in dealing with rape victims, given how such assumptions have affected popular culture.
"Any reaction is normal," Trembley said. "You can't put it into a little box of exactly how a rape victim acts."
She said victims range from completely casual to completely hysterical.
Rochford-Hague described how a history of 'victim-blame' sexual assault in America is the basis for the country's present sentiments.
"It's definitely our job to get our children and our peers to change their attitudes so we can show rape survivors that we understand what they're dealing with," Trembley said.
