A week ago today, Dan Boyer '94 took his own life. Yesterday, friends and family gathered for a service of "celebration and thanksgiving."
It is difficult to find words to describe the beauty of what happened in Rollins Chapel yesterday. Two grieving families -- the Boyer family and the Dartmouth family -- joined together and everyone left just a little bit stronger.
Which family helped the other more, no one knows. More than 500 students, faculty members and administrators helped the Boyer family understand just how many people cared about Dan, and also that the people who spent the most time with Dan over the last three years are as perplexed by his sudden death as the people he grew up with.
Reminisces shared by Dan's friends -- multiple mentions of his bright yellow L.L. Bean jacket and tortoise-shell glasses -- offered Dan's father perhaps his first chance to smile in a week.
But then it was Dan's father, Daniel B. Boyer III, a member of the Class of 1966, who took hold of the podium and consoled so many students grieving the death of a friend.
Mr. Boyer's words, spoken in a hushed tone, echoed throughout the chapel and will echo again and again in the coming weeks and months in the minds of those mourning Dan.
"Rather than attempting to answer the unanswerable," Mr. Boyer suggested, "let us celebrate the various ways he has touched our lives. Let us all begin the healing process by rejoicing in all of the wonderful moments that we shared with him."
For the Boyer family and the Dartmouth family, the healing process is underway. It began with songs and prayer and remembrance, with tears and with hugs. Most of all, it began yesterday with a strong showing of family support.
