The medical profession has its own jargon; the legal world has its particular vernacular; sports have their own vocabularies. Like most other walks of life, Dartmouth is replete with its own unique lexicon of words, phrases and expressions. To those unaccustomed to this lingo, "joe" may be a friend of yours, the "Heisman" might be a College football trophy, and "scope" might be a mouthwash. But in order to shed the status of a clueless 'shmen, this language is critical to master. Here is our list of the bare essentials.
anal -- in no way applies to anything Greek; does apply to most everyone at Dartmouth otherwise they wouldn't have gotten in: uptight.
back -- to support whole-heartedly; for example,
'SHMEN: Dude, she wants to scam with you.
DUDE: Dude, I'm backin' that hard.
beast -- the beer of choice in most fraternity basements, known to brothers for its cheap cost and to drinkers for its cheap taste; likely to be found at ALL dorm parties.
of freshmen students.
beer-goggling -- As Calvin says, "Friends don't let friends beer-goggle," but most of Dartmouth doesn't listen. The sport in which relative inebriation makes members of the opposite sex significantly more attractive.
BEMA -- the Big Empty Meeting Area where you gather for first-year trip games.
biff -- the euphemism for a royal screw-up. For example:
ROOMIE 1: Dude, what happened last night?
ROOMIE 2: Well, you beer-goggled and you really biffed ...
birks -- for most, these shoes are only worn (and always worn) in the warmer months, but for the crunchy granola Collis rats, these are best worn over a nice thick pair of wool socks any time of year.
blitz -- (n) the College's electronic mail system; a form of communication that replaces any personal conversations or phone calls over the first few weeks of freshman fall. (v) to send an electronic mail message.
boom boom lodge -- another name for Theta Delta Chi fraternity -- 'nuff said.
boot -- after a few hours of drinking beast, you'll soon learn what this is.
broadcast -- the instantaneous alternative to BlitzMail, appears on the receiver's computer screen over everything. BEWARE -- this often leads to the loss of nearly completed papers.
campus po -- the group of little old ladies with flashlights who shake their fingers at naughty students wandering aimlessly down the row; best known for the way they break up parties to make you put your beers down (at least temporarily). Don't be fooled, though, the alcohol violations they hand out come with more than a slap on the wrist. Seriously, they are there to help - campus police should be called for any emergency.
Cheese Lodge -- museum which houses the most cheese sirens on campus; the nickname of Alpha Chi Alpha fraternity given for the brothers' tendency to lay it on thick.
Chi Scam -- even when they're not beer-goggling, the brothers of Chi Gam fraternity have a habit of trying to pick up every female in sight.
chug -- usually in contest form, this tests your ability to make a cup of beer disappear before your comrades. Often times, more of the drink ends up on your shirt than down your throat.
circuit -- a round passing through every fraternity on any given night; usually consists of a group chug in each basement.
crunchy -- an adjective used to describe the most natural of students; often seen in birks or Tevas conglomerating at Collis Cafe before it was shut down.
The D -- you're reading it. JOIN!!! SUBSCRIBE NOW!!!!
Dartmouth relationship --
deal -- suck it up; just do it -- now.
dis -- dinged, rejected, sent home, cast out, shot down, shafted. See also the Heisman.
Emmit -- a native of New Hampshire (who doesn't go to the College) with a year-round sun burn on the back of the neck; rare sightings in fraternity basements since College ID is a must and they probably couldn't figure out how to fake one.
frat rat -- someone who consistently hangs out in one fraternity basement (sometimes more than the brothers do), i.e. a Zete rat, an AD rat, a Sigma Who rat (yeah, right).
Full Boot/Jam/Scam -- officially Full Fare, Thayer's all-you-can-eat cafeteria frequented mainly by athletes; the Sunday morning spot for brunch. And you thought that only when you're in class do things go in and come right out.
glom -- sucking of face; popular during the last slow song on the dance floor of Chi Scam.
granola -- see crunchy.
grim -- the ultimate of disgusting; i.e. the trough in AD, the stench in Heorot, the object of beer-goggling; the after effects of Full Boot, results on an Orgo exam, etc.
gut -- the course everyone looks for around freshman spring to fool the 'rents into thinking you're actually studying; the popular classes to fill science distribs, including Clouds, Stars, Rocks, Oceans, Chem Fun.
H.B. -- where first-year students flock before and after every meal, in between classes, as soon as they get up, before they go to bed, to see if the 'rents have sent money, care packages, letters, or any signs of acknowledgment.
the Heisman --
hook up -- the alternative to relationships at Dartmouth -- the one night stand usually preceded by beer-goggling and followed by the walk of shame (see below).
hosed -- screwed; i.e. Emmit 1 to Emmit 2: You're hosed for that Clouds exam.
H.T.H. -- home town honey; excuse for not participating in the Dartmouth hook-up scene.
Jimmy O. -- our beloved president and friend.
joe -- the added appendage that is an accumulation of weeks of beast, EBAs pizza, Full Jam brunches and Harry's runs. Be prepared to introduce him to family and friends upon returning home.
key -- ultra important; i.e. the inside room of a two-room double is definitely key, Timberland boots are key during Hanover winters.
LSPlay -- an $8,000 vacation that magically appears on your transcript as school work.
mung -- the adhesive layer in the floor of fraternity basements after a few hours of each party; tends to make a slurping noise when partiers try to move around the room.
not much -- the obligatory response to "wassup," this comment displays about as much interest as the inquiry.
p.c. -- for Emmits and the like this refers to Peter Christian's restaurant, but for all those remotely aware of the campus climate, this bespeaks of the politically correct movement that has fastened its immutable grip on this campus in the past few years; first girls became women, now women are womyn, freshman trips are now for first-year students, you get the picture.
Parkhursted -- one of the more interesting leave term options at campus; not voluntary.
pong -- besides beer-goggling, this is the most popular sport in fraternity basements. When students realize that there's nothing left to talk about, they try to cover it up by heading for the pong table to either lob or slam, depending on the house.
pop -- for all those who have never been to Iowa, this is translated as soda; often drunk in the corn fields after a hard day's tractor pull. For those who are less than familiar with mid-westerners, go easy on them -- they really do mean well.
psyched -- pumped, excited, stoked. i.e.
TED: Dude, I aced my orgo exam.
RAGER: you're so psyched! (you're also dreaming ...)
rage -- to party like you never partied before; tends to happen most Monday, Wednesday, Friday and Saturday nights, with the occasional Tuesday, Thursday and Sunday thrown in.
rally -- to emerge from the depths of tooldom and rise to the uttermost heights of rageosity.
random -- anyone not from Dartmouth (not an affectionate term); bizarre, out of the ordinary; random.
'rents -- the signature on your tuition check belongs to them.
rock on -- words of encouragement, keep up the good work; the motto of the Equestrian Team (as in rock on with your bad self).
the Row -- Webster Avenue, fraternity row. Home to eight frats, two sororites, one co-ed and President Freedman.
scam -- to bring the puck down the ice and try to put it in the net, or at least put a few shots on goal; often met with the Heisman. For those of you not getting the hint, this is a romantic endeavor and depending on taste perhaps athletic as well.
scope -- to scout out potential players (see above).
'shmen -- that's you.
'shmenu -- the facebook of your pictures, most often used by students for potential scams.
stride of pride/walk of shame or fame -- the walk home on the morning after a successful scam; depending on how you look at it determines which name you choose. Person usually operates under the misconception that he or she is moving inconspicuously.
super suck -- get your minds out of the gutter! It's the central vacuum cleaning system in the dorms. Really.
sweet -- so fine; i.e. getting above the mean is sweet, getting above the mean in Orgo is beyond sweet.
'tails -- in another league than beast; the drink served Thursday nights at Zete and the first and last Monday of every term at the Cheese Lodge; take advantage of it!
ted -- simply put, a nerd, one who tools on a weekend night
Thayer layer -- Dartmouth's version of the freshman fifteen.
tool -- the actions of a ted. Performed best in the Tower Room and not at all in the Observe Corridor. To engage vigorously in one's studies, normally seen the night before a paper is due.
wassup? -- a Dartmouth way of saying hi; not meant to be met with a response other than "not much." It is typical to get the response, "fine thanks," in which case you know it was received in the right context.
wasted -- the condition achieved after chugging too much beast while playing lob pong in the mung at Chi Gam while scoping out potential hook-ups (If you understood this, you've passed the Dartspeak test).
what-ever -- the best response to anything you don't want to deal with.
