By Corey Vann, The Dartmouth Staff
Published on Tuesday, February 5, 2013
“This will be the best Super Bowl in a while.” That was the proclamation made by San Francisco 49ers runningback Frank Gore on Super Bowl media day. When he made this statement, I couldn’t help but laugh. C’mon Frank! You’re in the NFL — don’t you remember the past five Super Bowls? And how they have all been unreal?
2008: The New York Giants ruin the New England Patriots’ perfect season.
2009: Back and forth shootout between the Arizona Cardinals and the Pittsburgh Steelers. Ben Roethlisberger and Santonio Holmes outlast Kurt Warner and Larry Fitzgerald.
2010: New Orleans Saints defeat the Indianapolis Colts. Terry Porter’s pick six. Katrina salvation. Peyton Manning at a loss for words.
2011: Green Bay Packers come from out of nowhere to take down the Pittsburgh Steelers.
2012: The New York Giants spoil another Super Bowl for Tom Brady and Bill Belichick!
Did Super Bowl XLVII top the last five? No, XLII still takes the cake. When the Patriots lost, I felt like one of the members of the perfect 1972 Miami Dolphins, and I even uncorked a bottle of champagne (well my family did, I was only 18 at the time).
That said, the game on Sunday night was insane, so now it’s time to break down the good, the bad and the really uncomfortable things that will forever be connected to the Ravens victory.
Joe Flacco: What a day for Joe Flacco. Ever since he entered the league, nothing has ever been good enough when it comes to Flacco. Despite the fact that he has never missed the playoffs, his game and his character are always in question. Now the only thing I can think of when you say his name is “cha ching!” In a contract year, to go out and have that type of playoffs means serious bank. Defeating the Colts, Patriots and 49ers in back-to-back-to-back games means this guy is the real deal. His arm is special, his confidence is there and Flacco says he isn’t going anywhere. The Ravens are about to pay up and Baltimore will reap the rewards for a very long time.
Jacoby Jones and Beyonce: Houston Texans general manager, Rick Smith, must be losing his mind. First he cuts Trindon Holliday. The same little man who terrorized the Ravens with two return touchdowns. And then to add insult to injury, Jones has the game of his life in the Super Bowl — a kick return touchdown and a receiving touchdown, accompanied by unbelievable celebration dances, which were close to rivaling Beyoncé’s at half time.
Anquan Boldin: Good for you my man. You took the road less traveled, got out of purgatory (being on the Arizona Cardinals) and got yourself a Super Bowl ring. Take note Larry Fitzgerald.
Taco Bell commercial: Bravo! I was dying of laughter for a minute straight. How do they know everything I normally do on a Friday night?
CBS and “The Blackout”: How does that happen! It’s the Super Bowl! Companies spend four million dollars for just a 30-second commercial, and you have a blackout? And CBS, next time something like this happens, can you guys please figure out when the lights are going to be back on? Not “oh any minute now!” I don’t need Solomon Wilcots’ estimations, I need facts.
Chris Culliver: Talk about Karma dude. You’re from San Francisco, you go on record during media day saying how you wouldn’t want a homosexual on your team and then you expect to play well? It doesn’t work like that.
THE REALLY UNCOMFORTABLE
Go Daddy commercial: I love Bar Rafaeli. She’s beautiful and the first time the commercial aired it was funny. A really hot girl making out with a really nerdy guy, I get it. But playing it over and over just got weird.
Ray Lewis: If you read my article from a couple weeks ago you know why this one just doesn’t feel right. He’s still a criminal in my eyes.
The Harbaugh family: As a parent, how are you supposed to root for one son over the other? How are you supposed to react when “x” son loses? And how about the handshake? If my brother and I played in the Super Bowl, I would want to beat him, and I would. But after the game, he wouldn’t get a handshake — he would get an enormous hug.