Published on Friday, May 25, 2012
’14 Girl 1: Yesterday we went on a date. ’14 Girl 2: Where’d you go? ’14 Girl 1: Mai Thai. ’14 Girl 2: You’re such a slut.
’13 Girl: I’m never going to Psi U again. Unless I plan to sleep there. Then I’ll go.
’12 Guy: What if I want to have sex every day and my wife only wants to have sex once a year? Govt. Prof: It’s called compromise — have sex twice a year.
’13 Girl: What do you say when people are tweeting you up? You’re threaded?
FO&M Lawn Mower Operator at 8 a.m. outside Woodward: Well, that’s not the first time I’ve mowed over a thong.
’12 Girl: I like hanging out with you. It’s because I have no morals.
’13 Girl: Being a minority is such a resume- builder.
Linguistics Prof: If you don’t know the definition of modial auxiliary, memorize it now and know it from this point forward, to impress your friends ... and intimidate your enemies.